Should wives have secret bank accounts?
This was a discussion I joined in one of the online boards I am a member of. The argument whether wives should keep a secret bank account or not elicited a lot of comments.
Basically, the idea behind the keeping a secret account is self-empowerment. If the husband leaves the wife, whether through separation or death, the wife will have something to keep the family afloat. Or if the husband falls ill and become incapacitated, there will be some money to tide the family over. Or if the husband is reckless with money, the wife will have something to feed and clothe her children.
But is having a secret bank account the answer?
Yes, I believe in self-empowerment but I don’t believe that I am empowering myself by having a secret bank account. The secret to empowerment is to be your own woman and this means, having your own career, knowing how to make and keep money, and being self-reliant.
Cash in the bank can only get you so far. It can tide you over for just a few months. But what happens after that?
If the husband leaves the wife and takes all the money, life doesn’t end for the wife. If she knows how to work, if she knows how to make money, if she has a good sense of self, no man can ever take her life away. All she needs to do is stand up and work for herself and her children.
It’s the same thing if the man falls ill and becomes unable to work or, worse, dies. The family can stay afloat if the wife has her own career. She can take up the responsibility of raising her family.
This is the reason why I never subscribed to the idea of women being stay-at-home moms (SAHM). I don’t judge them for their choice but it is something I will probably never do. I’ve always believed that even if a woman chooses to stay at home to take care of the kids, she should still do things to earn money, even if it’s just a small amount each month. Nowadays, there are a lot of money-making opportunities for women who stay at home—doing arts and crafts, baking and cooking, online selling, paid blogging, Google Adsense, you name it.
Keeping a secret bank account is not the answer if a woman’s concern is her future. What she needs is to be her own woman, have her own career and be self-reliant.